Seperation Anxiety: What can help.

If your kiddo is starting a new daycare or moving to a new classroom, parents may notice that dropping their children off has become a little more difficult. Although not every child experiences separation anxiety, it is very common for kiddos to become upset when saying goodbye. Though it can be very unsettling, families should remember that going through separation anxiety is typical in emotional development. In order to help your kiddo through this stage, families need to understand what drives separation anxiety and how to identify coping skills that work for their family.

What is Separation Anxiety?

Children’s separation anxiety can be triggered by many different factors, but children experience separation anxiety when they are being separated from their caregivers, who they trust and feel safe with. Families might experience this when they leave for work, drop off at school, or sometimes even just leaving the room can trigger seperation anxiety. When you try to leave, your kiddo may become clingy, become upset or throw a tantrum.

Separation anxiety can begin in infancy and last through preschool, while some kiddos may never experience it at all. Kids will also experience different degrees of separation anxiety. For example, some may experience it when their parents leave, even if it is just to go to another room, whereas other children may only experience it when big changes happen, such as starting at a new daycare.

How to Help Separation Anxiety

Seeing your kiddo get upset when you leave can be very upsetting for parents, but there are a few ways to help ease your child’s separation anxiety.

1. If you know that a big change is approaching, such as starting a new daycare, prepare them for it in advance. We encourage families to schedule visits prior to their first day, so that their kiddos can become familiar with the classroom and teachers before they start full-time. This helps your kiddo feel like they are part of a community.

2. Create a quick goodbye routine. This could be something as simple as a cute goodbye phrase, or creating a special handshake. Whatever you decide, try to make your goodbye short and sweet. The longer you stay, the more upset your kiddo will likely become when it’s time to leave.

3. Be consistent. At first, this may be difficult to do, but eventually your child will come to expect it and the consistency will help diminish your kiddo's anxiety.

4. Keep your promises. If you do promise you will return when leaving kiddos be sure to keep your promises to them, as this will help build trust and confidence when you are apart.

It’s important to remember that experiencing separation anxiety is a normal part of emotional and social development in children. If you have any concerns regarding your kiddo's separation anxiety, talk to your pediatrician who can provide some clarity and resources.